Supporting During Early Pregnancy
When your partner first learns about a pregnancy, it can be a wide range of emotions. You as a couple may feel scared, excited, nervous, or thrilled. The best thing you can do to support your pregnant partner during those early weeks is with good communication. Encourage your partner to talk through any feelings they are having and open up about what you’re feeling, too. Talking about the desire to be a great parent – your goals, plans and other expectations and experiences – can put you both on the same page and align you both. Teamwork is very important during pregnancy and helps set you up for a solid path for parenthood, too. Some ways you can do that include:
- Offer to go with your partner to the doctor or midwife appointments
- Go shopping for baby equipment and gear together
- Encourage your partner to take naps and rest as much as necessary
- Asking what your partner needs physically – new clothing, specific foods, etc.
- Research pregnancy facts together
Supporting During the Second Trimester
As your partner moves into the next phase of the pregnancy, they are likely to feel better and together, you can talk about more details. This is a good time to start talking about getting a will together if you haven’t already, plan for finances, talk about daycare or nanny options, and get life insurance. These are big topics with big decisions associated with them, so talk about these things in little bits at a time, if needed. It can feel stressful and overwhelming sometimes to tackle huge topics all at once and your focus should be to ensure your partner is as relaxed and stress free as possible.
Another way you can support your partner during this time is by doing physical activity together or helping cook and make healthy menu plans for the week. The baby is undergoing lots of growth and chances during the second trimester and encouraging your partner to be healthy and active is important.
Supporting During the Third Trimester
Things are getting real now! The baby is getting bigger and your partner’s belly is growing. There are lots of plans to be made during this time, too. Coming up with a birth plan is one of the most important parts of this time. Support your partner by asking questions about what type of birth plan they envision and voice your thoughts as well. This is also a good time to take a tour of the facility your baby will be born, sign up for classes on birth or newborn care, and research what’s going to happen at the birth. As your partner gets closer to giving birth, it can get uncomfortable physically.
Consider offering regular foot massages, helping clean the house, or hiring a housekeeper. You can also offer to buy things for their hospital bag that will make their stay more comfortable – fuzzy socks, their favorite snacks, lotions, or a soft robe would be great things to surprise your partner with as they plan to get things together. As they work on getting a list together, don’t be surprised if they change their mind a lot on what they need or want. Be patient and remember that there are a lot of emotions happening at this stage in the game! Your support is critical during these final weeks of preparation and it will go a long way in making your partner feel more at ease.
Throughout the pregnancy, don’t be afraid to talk, sing, or play music to the baby. While there are definitely a lot of unknowns throughout the pregnancy journey, one thing is certain: you can bond with the baby to be a better parent, even if you aren’t the one experiencing the pregnancy first hand. It’s normal to feel some anxiety amid the plans and excitement, so be sure to take care of your own physical and mental health, too. Speak openly and honestly about your feelings and talk to a counselor therapist if needed. Pregnancy is temporary but being a parent is for a lifetime – so it’s important to make sure you prioritize your own health and wellbeing to be the best version of yourself as you can.
You and your partner created this wonderful gift and establishing a bond before the baby is born is possible!
